How to Keep a Check on Your Parent's Mental Well-being?

"It is not the bruises on the body that hurt. It is the wounds of the heart and the scars on the mind."Aisha Mirza

Such was the case of Mr Krishna Gautams father, who after losing his wife showed signs of rapid ageing. He forgot how to wash, dress or do his daily chores, which became worse over the years. Family and relatives advised Mr Gautam to accept them as natural eccentricities of old age and hush it up.

However, a short visit to the hospital opened Mr Gautam’s eyes. He came to know about incurable dementia- as doctors call it. By the time, he was taken to a psychologist and given the prescribed medicines, his condition worsened. He had become completely unrecognisable. He passed away in 2012 at the age of 84. Mr. Gautam was taken aback by the lack of awareness, and absence of services and help for parents with mental health issues in the society around him. This led to the foundation of ‘Ageing Nepal’ which focuses on building knowledge and increasing societal awareness through research and training. The organisation also takes care of in-house patients who suffer from dementia and other mental health issues.  The story unveils the journey of a son with his father at life's last stage and shows that only a responsible child can grow up to be a responsible caregiver.

Do you also have a similar story to share? Keep reading the article to know more about how you can ensure optimum care to your elderly parents. 

Does Mental Well-being mean the same as Mental Health?

Mental well-being is a combination of how you feel and how you interact with your surroundings, like relationships with friends and family, personal independence, and purpose in life. It is directly linked to happiness and satisfaction. 

Mental health is a state of mind that enables you to deal with the stresses of life, realise your abilities to learn and work and understand your potential to contribute to your community. 

The ageing population is more prone to behavioural and mood disorders due to depression and anxiety. Almost 10.6% of the total disability amongst the geriatric population suffer from mental disorders according to Global Health Estimates, 2019.

What Affects the Mental Health of Parents

Ageing parents are more exposed to societal adversities due to reduced income, increased medical disabilities, and loss of functional abilities. Both their physical and mental health decline, which can be overwhelming both for them and for their loved ones.

• One of the major factors affecting the mental wellness of parents in older age is social isolation and neglect. Due to this loneliness, some are even subjected to physical, verbal, financial and even psychological abuse, mostly by their carertakers.  
• In many cases, we find the aged wife taking care of her husband with no help around. This can get emotionally and physically stressful if the husband is suffering from a chronic mental health condition like dementia, or Alzheimer's.
• Mental health help for parents becomes even more essential when the basic living conditions do not support a healthy life. This can happen due to financial stress of reduced income or chronic life-threatening illnesses like Cancer, heart disease or stroke and even incurable neurological conditions and substance use problems.

Being uncertain of the future with fear of the unknown, mental health support for parents when they age, should be an essential part of a grown-up child's responsibilities.

Mental Health of Parents with Special Needs 

The lack of knowledge and awareness about geriatric mental conditions is a challenge that you will face if you are parenting adults with mental illness. Yes ‘parenting’ is the word here as it becomes a herculean task to make them realise first, that these challenges are not necessarily ‘normal’ and second, there is no shame in accepting that they need special help to deal with it. In case you are your parent’s mental health support keep an eye out for these common disorders: 

Depression

It is amongst the hardest one to identify as it varies in degree with the situation, the person's physical and mental health and one’s emotional abilities. The signs often include feelings of hopelessness, excessive fatigue, poor concentration, forgetfulness, irritability, loss of appetite or overeating and sometimes aches or pains for no apparent cause. 

Dementia

Difficult to distinguish this condition from depression as they have overlapping symptoms. Dementia also shows symptoms like sleep disturbance, memory loss, loss of interest in any social or pleasurable activities, isolation etc. 

Late-onset Bipolar Disorder

This is a disorder that is surprisingly common in the older generation. This causes fluctuating and manic changes in mood. Sometimes they can be super active and energised and sometimes they may suffer from manic depression. LOBD may happen as an after-effect of cerebrovascular diseases and may show more depressive episodes. But, not to worry, this can be cured if diagnosed and treatment is provided.

Generalised Anxiety Disorder

Anxiety follows with depression in older adults. Professional caregivers who support parents of adults with mental health issues, should be aware of these symptoms of anxiety. These include constant worrying about unimportant events, overthinking any decision and imagining worst outcomes, indecisiveness, inability to relax, difficulty in focussing on one work, and persisting restlessness.  The physical manifestations include muscle fatigue, aches and pains, heavy sweating and digestive issues like irritable bowel syndrome.

Other Anxiety Disorders

These are subsets of GAD. Some specific phobias, social anxiety, and panic attacks are a few of them. If you are providing mental health support for parents, be aware of these anxiety issues as they are more complicated to treat than depression.

The medications will not be able to subside the effects. However, cognitive behavioural therapy or sessions with psychologists may help improve the condition. Having an open community talk can also be helpful in these cases.

Additionally, to keep your parents’ mental well-being intact, you can opt for a comprehensive senior citizen health insurance plan with coverage for old-age related ailments and pre-existing disease to provide good healthcare facilities to them.

How to Support Aged Parents for their Mental Well-being?

When even a single effort counts, here are a few pointers to take care of while supporting your aged parents to keep their metal well-being:

Socialising

The worst fears an elderly faces are loneliness and isolation. They may not admit it, but a report from the National Academies of Sciences, Engineering and Medicine states that almost one-fourth of adults aged 65 years are socially isolated. Loneliness can be due to the  death of loved ones, shifting to an assisted living facility, or staying away from family members. Encourage them to meet their friends, take an educational course, help join in sports like golfing, bowling, and chess, form an online community on Social Media, hosting game nights, and look into group travels. Volunteering in non-governmental organisations will also help them feel important and useful to society. Mental wellness for parents can be maintained through adequate planning and an active schedule. Let’s say you’ve bought Senior Citizen Health plan offered by Care Health Insurance. No doubt, you may be able to provide the best healthcare without compromising on the quality during a medical emergency, but for their mental wellness, it is important to make them feel wanted.

Physical Environment

Looking after the  mental health of parents with special needs can involve some structural changes at home as well. As they age, the issues with mobility and strength proportionately increase. The more prone they are to the obstacles and hazards at home, the more anxious and restless they will become. Your house’s interior must provide enough room for effortless movement.  Make sure to provide a positive surroundings with lively home décor, furniture, wall colours etc. Even some simple efforts can  become huge mental health help for parents. 

Nutritional Requirements

Food is an integral part of our livelihood. And who does not love good food? It is a mood lifter and brings people closer. But did you know that some food can trigger symptoms of stress and anxiety and even make it worse? It is like an unbreakable cycle. When you are stressed, you reach out for food for mental comfort and invariably pick up unhealthy choices including junks and alcohol. Hence, monitoring what is there on their menus might be of great help to parents with mental health issues to stay healthy.

Incorporate healthy alternatives in their regular meals like, fruits, fresh vegetables, oats, vegan milk and sugar-free sweets to make them feel better. Do not try to completely overhaul their diets but gradually include better alternatives to make them realise the difference. 

To Conclude 

As your parents age, it is wiser to empower them with knowledge of the mental health challenges that they might face in future. If you notice distinct changes in behaviour or find them unreasonable, do take the advice of a professional medical practitioner. Try to make small changes at a time to make them feel less isolated, incorporate healthy food options and make positive changes in and around your house. By focusing on planning and collaborating you can hold their hands through this journey like they did, every step of your way when you were a child. With every single preparation you must also invest in a good senior citizen health insurance plan to get coverage for all age-related health complications.

>> Also Read: How to Choose the Right Health Insurance for Parents?

Disclaimers: The above information is for reference purposes only: Policy Assurance and Claims at the underwriter’s discretion.